LOTD12 – Waking Up

Waking-Up-Blog-Post2

I don’t usually write long blog posts… Facebook has more often been where I’ll write when I want to take time to write. But this being a bit more personal – I just don’t feel like plastering it all over that social media. The ones who will be looking @ my blog are prob the ones who know me. =)

SO.. Go ahead and scroll down to the bottom if you’re here for the goods! This is acting as my journal atm. =)

I am one of those ppl that wants to help as much as I possibly can if I feel someone is genuine. I’ll work my butt off… Give you money.. Give you everything you need to find happiness & success.

But when I realize, after bending and bending, that you aren’t going to help yourself and work as hard as I was for you or that you’re taking advantage.. I’m done. I can’t help it but my urge to help dies there. I work hard… Really hard. And I try to be honest and I will not use to gain or ladder climb. Because of that, I don’t hang with many or socialize even.

Not many know this, because I don’t tell many. It’s kind of something I’ve been a little embarassed of for so very long but I’m a very anti social person because in RL, I have social anxiety. I’ve gotten better over the past year tremendously with overcoming my issues. But even with my own parents, I could feel my heart in my throat if I was talked to directly.. I’d get physically sick if I knew I was going to have some attention on me. I was happy being at the back of the crowd listening. SL/FB has def helped me with that. I used to delete these posts before I published.. But someone, whom I’m not really friends with anymore, once told me… Fake it till you make it. She helped me force myself into my discomfort zone to do what needed to be done. I’ll always be thankful to her for teaching me that, regardless of what happened after. Because it taught me to swallow my nerves, pretend to be brave and to just do it. It’s a healing process and gets better every time.

The few who ‘get me’, I’m thankful for because those are the ones I’ve found I can be myself with.

So ty! I’ve got some pretty awesome friends who support me and help me be who I am.. Ones that I know are genuine.. Who help me daily & who I’d step in front of a bus for.

———————————————————————

-CREDITS-

Hair: Magika [Hair] Dreamy

Shape: Mine – Not for Sale

Skin: Essences – Tila {medium02}

Eyes: Vita’s Budoir Closed Eyes make up

Shirt: Tee*fy Isobel Tank

Skirt: Blueberry – Belted Denim Skirt

Gloves: [geek.] Big Daddy Elements Pyro – @ Totally Top Shelf

Warpaint: [rk] Jellybean Warpaint (FULLBODY) -FALL- *temp closed*

Boots: TonkTastic – Gumboots

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